day by day

Life goes on, one day at a time. That’s the cruelty of death - life goes on, even when my heart is gone. Many difficult things have to be done, awful reminders that Ray is not here. I miss him so dreadfully, my whole being just aches. The children are beginning to talk about their Daddy a bit each day, but often end in tears as the awful realisation hits them again. It’s so hard to try to pick up the pieces of a normal life again, I still don’t know how to start, so we are pretty much still drifting along, doing only what has to be done to keep family and home together, making as few decisions as possible for our immediate future.

We still have family members staying with us most days, it helps to keep us occupied and busy. The worst times are when I am alone, and able to think. I don’t want to think, or I won’t be able to function at all for the overwhelming grief. I know this will become less with time, but in a way that seems wrong too. I am so tired, weary in body and soul. Thank you all for your love, prayers, and practical support - I am aware of being coccooned with love and care, and it really does make a huge difference.

hug your loved ones, and tell them how much they mean to you every day.

layout from May 2005: the years have changed us in so many ways - who could have seen where our journey would lead us? and who can know what tomorrow will bring? words are so inadequate to tell you what I feel, but I trust that my heart will speak to yours and you will know how deeply you are loved.

Deb that is a beautiful photo…and a beautiful layout. I hope that your LO’s about your wonderful husband bring you comfort. I think of you daily…

Hi Deb. You and yours remain in my daily prayers. God bless you all.
Much love.

Deb, you and the children are constantly in my thoughts and in my prayers. So good to hear from you. Marci

Thoughts and prayers are with you. xxx

I will pray for you and your family.
hugs

Beautiful layout. It’s good to hear from you. God bless you.

Your LO is beautiful! You and your family continue to be in my thoughts and prayers daily Deb!

Awesome layout! Praying for you and your family.

Beautiful LO.. I have no doubt in my mind that Ray knows just how much you all love him and always will.

I’m glad you have that support around you. That is a beautiful layout and I’m sure Ray does know just how much he is loved. Thanks for dropping in, I’m still keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

Your beautiful LO captures such a precious moment to be treasured always. The love you feel for Ray just flows from the page, it is so wonderful. You and your family are in my thoughts Deb, take care of yourself.

One day, one hour, one minute at a time Deb, you are in my thoughts and prayers.

A lovely layout Deb, and one I have not seen before. You take care of you and the kids, one day at a time.

Deb, you and the children are in my thoughts and prayers daily. My children have had so many extra cuddles lately. I am glad to hear that you are still being surrounded in love and support, anything you need, be it practical or a shoulder to lean on - just call…I’ll be there.

It is so good to see a post from you and see your wonderful LO. Just one day at a time for now is the best way to go. Your hardest part is going to be when all your visitors are gone and you are alone with your thoughts and memories–but you can get through it. Your children will be your strongest allies. Even after 25 years, I still have my bad days but they are far outnumbered by the good. You WILL get better, I promise.

I pray for you and your family daily.

We are still praying for your family. Many hugs out to you all.

my heart aches for you and your family..deb..I cannot imagine the loss..only tell you that you and yours are remembered in my prayers at night..God Bless You all..what a lovely handsome beautiful husband..you have in memories and in your heart..and waiting in heaven for you…God Bless..

Lovely LO. I’m still thinking about you all and sending prayers everyday. I even had some family and friends pray for you and your family. >>

Ah… Deb,
You and your darling children are in my thoughts quite often. I say a prayer everytime I think of you.
God love you.

Deb, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers daily, love your LO and keep your heart strong

I know that this is a very hard time for you and the children and my heart is breaking for you Dear….But take the blessings the Lord gives you each day and Remember Ray in your heart as the man who gave you 7 beautiful children…Even though he is gone he will remain with you in your Heart….and somehow you will find peace with that….You and the children are in my thoughts and prayers….Sending you all many many Healing Hugs….Grammadiane

Deb, I am sooooo sorry you and your family are going through this.. I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers…

Michelle Pearson

still thinking of you every single day. HUGS.

I know “One day at a time,” is so cliche, but fitiing. Hang in there, Deb, leaning on those who love you and on the God who olds your future and Ray in His arms. The hurt will ease and will make room for the wonderful memories of all you have shared together over the yers. Those memories will comfort and sustain you until you are together again. I love you Sweetie, and pray for you and the children daily.

Deb, I pray that for the times when you have to be alone, and you feel the grief starting to overwhelm you, that you then feel God’s loving arms around you and you feel peace - “the PEACE of God, which transcends all understanding, and it will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus” (Phil 4:7) Praying also that you and the kids are able to have restful sleep. Sending love and hugs to you all. Jen H

Deb, hang in there sweetie. You know that we are all praying for you, and hugging on you and the kids the best that we can from so far away. Allow yourselves this time to grieve, it’s important. Just know that we are here, praying for the wonderful Peace that passeth all understanding. That Peace will comfort you and wrap you in love. G-d knows your grief, G-d hears your heart, and He loves you and the children so very much.

Sending peaceful thoughts your way. Wish I could help better..

All my love and prayers, Deb, to you and your children.

Good to see a post from you. The LO is lovely, such beautiful eyes! Praying for you and the children every day

I was lead here by a link to one of your PSP tuts. (I use PSP 7). I was sad to hear about your loss. Please know that I grieve with you and wish you well for the future. Just remember the “Footprints” poem. God is carrying you and your family right now.
Zen hugs for each of you. Peace.

Hello Deb…thank you for opening your heart to us here. I’m praying for you & your family. I can’t begin to understand what you’re going through but I can offer prayer for peace, comfort and healing for each one of you. Lean on God, that’s what I know.

Hugs to you–

God bless you Sweetie. I know that Ray knows how much you love him. And you’ll be together again one day. I’m praying for you and your precious children.

This is a beautiful photo of your husband. Deb just want to send you and your family some hugs. And for all those times when you are alone I hope only the beautiful memories will flood back to you and the painful memories lessen over time. My heart goes out to you.

My heart goes out to you at this very harrowing time. When I heard about your loss, I went and looked at your gallery and saw the lovely LO’s of your DH and was so choked, it was obvious that you adored him. He knows this and I am sure that he is still there with you, nestled safely in your heart and mind.
Take care of yourself and know that there are people out there in the world having a cry on your behalf to try to shoulder some of the grief. (((hugs)))

You and your family continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS!!

Dear Deb, people say things and mean well, but all you feel is numb. You carry on because of the children, even when you feel, you don’t know how you keep on breathing. The pain is like the Grand Canyon and you wonder if it will ever get better. Let me tell you..in time it will. I lost my beautiful husband 10yrs ago..he was 36. There is not a day go by when he is not in my thoughts, he is still in my heart, but the pain has lessened. I now smile when I think of him and thank god everytime I look at our daughter and see him…that a part of him is still here. How I love that. My life has moved on and I have loved again, it is strange that you can love again and it doesn’t deminish the love I had for my husband. Hang in there, all through I kept thinking how my husband would have wanted me to handle things! It took me a long time to throw out his…undies!
I what you to know that even though we are strangers…I feel your pain and boy I so wish that you didn’t have to go through it..but know that you and your children are in my thoughts and prayers.
Janene

You are in my prayers. I am so sorry for your loss. Hold on to your children, and God, and God will see you through this terrible time.

This is a beautiful layout, with wonderful journaling.

You and the children are in my prayers Deb, I wish I was closer so I could give you a big hug in person - I can’t imagine how terribly hard this time is for you.

Dear Deb.. words are futile with the sadness I feel for you and your children… Just know we are thinking of you all and take comfort in those around you - let them be your strength. Lean on them as much as you can when you need to…. Time does heal but some days just don’t go by fast enough for you… All our love & tho’ts Jo’anne (twinsmum2000) & Josh, Daneesha, Tyler & Meleiha xxxxx

Dear Deb.. words are so futile with the sadness I feel for you and your children… All I want to do is hug you and make it all right… Please know we are thinking of you all and take comfort in those around you - let them be your strength. Lean on them as much as you can whenever you need to, even if you don’t think so just do it…. Time does heal but some days just don’t go by fast enough & it’s all you can do to breath… All our love & tho’ts Jo’anne (twinsmum2000) & Josh, Daneesha, Tyler & Meleiha xxxxx

Oh, I am so sorry for you and your family.
The expression in Ray’s eyes is evidence of his love and watchfulness for you.
Love and sympathy for you all.

Linked over here from the ReadySetCreate blog and the good people there. Wanted you to know that I’m here in Edmonton Alberta Canada thinking about you and your children and praying daily. Even though I don’t know you personally, no sadness and loss doesn’t resound throughout the scrapbooking community, paper or digital or hybrid alike! Praying for God’s peace and the ability to rest restfully. Both I’m sure may be hard to find some days… Heidi